Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
