Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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