he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize