Moan for me like Helen Keller
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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