plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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