I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
