She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Can I color on your dick again?
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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