If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
