Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
