idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
