is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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