he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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