She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
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