Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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