i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 608 share tweet
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
