Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Randomize
