There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Randomize
