and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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