Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
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