GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I fill condoms, not promises.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize