Your mouth is God's brothel.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
its liver damage thursday
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