I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
