He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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