I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
