i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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