P.S. I can't hear my feet
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
