Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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