Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Randomize
