yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Randomize
