do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
You're earring is so big in my mouth
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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