My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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