i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
