NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Randomize
