But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
