spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Randomize
