it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Randomize
