is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I love you. Go after that dick
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
