so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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