i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Randomize
