Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Pants are for mortals
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
