whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
