I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
