I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Randomize
