I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Drunk is a universal language darling
Randomize