I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
