hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Randomize
