When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Randomize
