Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
It's shark week go big or go home
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Randomize
