in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
