Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Randomize