Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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