Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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